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I lust for Jetta

"I was jealous as hell when my friend Kit bought her Mustang a couple of years ago and i just about died inside my sister pulled up in a new G35 not too long after". And though anyone would consider it purely brotherly love, I felt extreme loathing when she offered a test drive... But did i drive it anyway? You bet your ass i did hehe. Just around the block though, at the risk of liking it too much.

I have driven three types of Mustangs, a 68 coupe 289cc, the late 80's early 90's boxy 5.0, and the beautiful retro-style harking back to the glory years of American muscle cars, 2007 GT. The GT being my favorite. I like both of the cars, they have similarities and differences that make both of them sort of unique. But first, i'll tell ya what i don't like about the cars. Because, that's more fun... As a somewhat gross generalization, i think most working-class semi-car-savvy people see both cars as nice and relatively expensive cars for daily transport. I like to refer to these people as car-beaters. The kind of people who drive nice cars (such as the GT and G35) but are not necessarily keen on upkeep and auto-hygiene nor do they have a high regard for cars period. They just know its nice! I mean how often do you see a late model BMW with all sorts of dents, scratches, and curbed wheels? (*Cough women *Cough).

I on the other hand view these nice cars quite differently. They are very nice and expensive no doubt, but i could never see myself beating these cars up. I would feel too bad. That said, you would probably never see me in those type of cars anyway, not even if i became a millionaire overnight. At least not as a daily driver. As a Toy Car sure but nothing more. Well wait, maybe not as toy cars either. The Mustang and G35's are heavy cars, well maybe after i gut them haha... That's probably the biggest issue about these cars, their portly figure. If you're wondering why a 2007 Mustang GT or the G35 for that matter, displacing a 4.6 liter V-8 producing 300 Horse Powers, is only a tick quicker than (0-60 mph-wise), say, a 2007 Honda Accord V-6, well that's because it weighs several hundred pounds more. But then again that is the American way, isn't it? How does it go? Oh right "No replacement for displacement", right. Just make everything BIGGER... Much of the same with the G35. In fact it is heavier than the Mustang despite displacing a much smaller V-6 motor under the hood. Save for the sweet sounding exhaust note, respectable handling (primarily because of the independent rear suspension), and nice curves, it is fundamentally the same car in my opinion (I'm sure i'm offending a lot of G35 guys right about now. What say you, Andrew?). And that my friends is a huge turn-off for me! Alright, before i lose myself let me just say one final thing about these fatty cars. And if you're wondering why they're so hefty, i will tell you. It's cost, it's all about cost. Light weight materials to build cars cost a bundle. Why do u think Porsche's and Ferrari's cost so much?

That's why i like the Corvette ZO6 so much. Chevrolet had somehow perfected the "There's no replacement for displacement" philosophy. Fitted with a monstrous 7.0 litter motor, it makes a very impressive 500 horsepower... Only weighing in at a slender 3130 lbs.

Back to the real world. Right now i am lusting for the special edition Volkswagen GLI Fahrenheit. That's probably something i never imagine i would ever say in this lifetime, yes i lust for a Jetta. Ya know if not for its Prussian Physicist name i could see myself seriously considering the car. Maybe there is a cool story behind naming the Special Edition Jetta after the guy who introduced the use of mercury in thermometers, but i don't like it. What is it with naming cars after people anyway? Where's the appeal? Let me ask you this; have you ever seen the Toyota Tundra Darrell Waltrip Edition or the Dale Earnhardt The Eliminator Chevy Monte Carlo? Believe me you-- its not that cool (I do like the Alex Zanardi Acura NSX hehe). But anyway, i like the Fahrenheit Jetta a lot. The custom Imola Yellow paint is just beautiful, the wheels are a nice fit, and the red break-calipers make it look real sporty, ala-Porsche. VW built only 1200 iterations of these brilliant cars, all individually numbered like they do the Saleen Mustangs (on the steering wheel). They even have a registry ala-Ferrari. The real question, i suppose, is could i ever see myself in one. Hmm i could see myself buying one for the wife (if i had one, duh!), how's that? If you like special somewhat unique cars albeit an ordinary brand this would fit the bill just fine i think. I believe this is the sweetest Jetta ever conceived. Yup that's right, i just used the word sweet as a superlative for a Volkswagen Jetta. Who wouldda thought?

To prolong my point about the peculiar name of this special Jetta, the Germans use an almost esoteric naming convention anyway. The Jetta alone has something like seven different variations including its European brothers. And lets not even get into its parent company Audi. Well maybe one model lol. Okay without referencing the internet the Audi 4 has the following model lines; A4 1.8T, 1.8T Quattro, 2.0T, 2.0T Quattro, A4 Avant, A4 Cabriolet, S4, S4 Avant, S4 Cabriolet, RS4, RS4 Cabriolet, yea you get the idea.

Well that's it folks. I'm done with car talk for now.

Posted by: Marc Gabay
Friday, November 30, 2007